5,000 Great One Liners - download pdf or read online

By Grant Tucker

ISBN-10: 1849544824

ISBN-13: 9781849544825

Whether instructed within the rugby golf equipment of Wales or the gentlemen's golf equipment of London, their sharpness and straightforwardness unites us all. brief, candy and wickedly shrewdpermanent, they carry a distinct position within the annals of comedy, and because the upward push of Twitter heralds a resurrection of the paintings shape, there turns out no larger time to rejoice the immortal one-liner. during this booklet, furnish Tucker does simply that, bringing jointly 5,000 of the funniest one-liners ever informed in a single definitive quantity. Laugh-out-loud humorous, 5,000 nice One-Liners has all of the quips, zingers, puns and wisecracks you will ever desire – and an entire lot extra.

Show description

Read Online or Download 5,000 Great One Liners PDF

Best british & irish books

Get Benang: From the Heart PDF

Oceanic in its rhythms and realizing, impressive in its use of language and snapshot, relocating in its largeness of spirit, compelling in its narrative scope and elegance, this interesting trip is a party and lament—of starting and go back, of obliteration and restoration, of silencing, and of robust utterance.

Download PDF by Ellis Peters: The Potter's Field (Brother Cadfael Mystery #17)

In October of 1142, a neighborhood landlord offers the Potter's box to the neighborhood clergy. The priests start to plow it, and the blades ensue the lengthy tresses of a tender girl, lifeless over a yr. Then the arriving of a amateur who fled from an abbey ravaged by way of civil battle in East Anglia complicates lifestyles even additional for Brother Cadfael.

Leon Guilhamet's Defoe and the Whig Novel: A Reading of the Major Fiction PDF

His research locations Defoe's significant fiction squarely within the rising Whig tradition of the early eighteenth century. It deals a substitute for the view that Defoe is largely a author of felony or experience fiction and to the Marxist judgment that he extols individualism or derives his maximum notion from renowned print tradition.

Additional resources for 5,000 Great One Liners

Sample text

I just saw Toy Story in 3D… The guy in 4D asked me to take off my hat. After winning a race, a jockey was found to have given his animal drugs and was disqualified. I bet that took him off his high horse. When people ask me ‘plz’ just because it’s shorter than ‘please’, I feel perfectly justified answering ‘no’ just because its shorter then ‘yes’. It wasn’t a bad idea to do trigonometry in the sun. I got a tan. I told everyone that I won the ‘Bullshitter of the Year’ award. But no one believed me.

My missus put on a real XXX show in front of the kids and some mates last night. That’s the last time I take her bowling. Gold: worth its weight in gold. Just because I’m unemployed doesn’t mean that I’m not busy. These mines aren’t going to sweep themselves. My fear of insomnia keeps me awake at night. My niece isn’t obese, she’s kidnap-resistant. I just saw Toy Story in 3D… The guy in 4D asked me to take off my hat. After winning a race, a jockey was found to have given his animal drugs and was disqualified.

If you misread that, you’re a paedophile. What happened just before the big bang? The big foreplay. I’m bored of the ‘Never had sex with a goat’ group. But it’s suspicious to quit. My Chinese mate always tells the truth. Believe Yu-Mi, he never lies. Why are there no casinos in China? Because the Chinese hate Tibet. Whenever I say something to my mates, they always expect it to be a joke and wait for the punch line… I hate that. It’s been exactly a year since I stopped smoking. And 364 days since I started again.

Download PDF sample

5,000 Great One Liners by Grant Tucker


by Donald
4.2

Rated 4.40 of 5 – based on 48 votes